House Party (May 4, 2014) - Card Announcement

Live! Easton, PA | Streaming via WIR.com
Many journalists and press are present for the card release of the first Wrestling is Reddit show. There is a small stage with a podium. A man with curly dirty-blond hair walks up to the podium with a piece of paper rolled up in his fist.

Man: Hello ladies and gentlemen, my name is Allen Paisner, and I am the CEO of Wrestling is Reddit, WIR for short.

A small patter of applause fills the room.

Paisner: I'm very excited to announce that our first show will be occurring right here in Easton, Pennsylvania. And it will kick off our Yet-to-be-Named Title Tournament!

Paisner gives a thumbs up.

Paisner: I came prepared, so here is a bracket for the first round.

He holds out the regular sized piece of paper, but it's written in pencil and we can't see it. Paisner looks at it and scuffles, embarrassed.

Paisner: Maybe I should have bought like a poster board or something. Oh well, I'll just read it off. Saturday, May 4, 2014 we will be right here for our very first show. Let me see here, now, we will kick off the show with tournament action...

1st Round Match: Karl "The Show" vs. Voltage
Paisner: Mr. 15% body fat vs. a true student of the game. Continuing the tournament, the next match will be...

1st Round Match: Tad Rodrickson vs. El Toxico
Paisner: Blood in, blood out vs. a man whose name means "the toxic." Make your own fuckin' joke... Alright... Now to break it up a little bit, we're gonna make it interesting with a fatal-four-way match between some people who unfortunately missed the cut-off for the tournament.

Nolan Hawk vs. Ransom Ray vs. Lorn vs. Carl “CJ” Jones
Paisner: Going back to our carnie roots: a bird, an emo, a dude with a handlebar mustache, and a British guy. It's the greatest show on Earth, folks. Okay, then we'll get back into the tournament...

1st Round Match: Hex vs. Sonny Carson
Paisner: I don't have a joke for this one. Moving on, to finish the tournament in our first main event ever. No reason, this is the main event, just because.

Erik Von Jarrett vs. Kyle Scott
Paisner: And that concludes our first show. If you have any questions, my assistant will take them shortly. See you guys on the 4th!

Paisner walks off stage as all of the reporters eagerly wait someone to take questions. Nobody comes to the stage.

©2014, All Rights Reserved | WIR.com

Final Card for Saturday, May 4, 2014:
OOC: Threads will be posted for each individual match, where you will promo. Promos are due Wednesday April 30, 11:59 PM EST. If you are interested in helping writing matches, please message me. As much as I would love to write all of these matches by myself...
 * 1) YTBNTT - 1st Round: Karl "The Show" vs. Voltage
 * 2) YTBNTT - 1st Round: Tad Rodrickson vs. El Toxico
 * 3) Ray Ransom vs. Nolan Hawk vs. Lorn vs. Carl “CJ” Jones
 * 4) YTBNTT - 1st Round: Hex vs. Sonny Carson
 * 5) YTBNTT - 1st Round: Erik Von Jarrett vs. Kyle Scott

Source

 * Original Reddit thread